Hopeful is a word filling my head lately. As the maiden moves deeper into living and learning to navigate the world as an adult with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD), I worry about what the future holds for her, but try to remain hopeful that it will be a more accepting place for her.
The above statistic, released in a report last year, frightened and shocked me. How could I remain hopeful that the maiden would have a full life, if the average life expectancy was 34 years of age? The report revealed the leading causes of death for people with FAS were “external causes” (44%), which include suicide (15%), accidents (14%), poisoning by illegal drugs or alcohol (7%), and other external causes (7%). Other common causes of death were diseases of the nervous and respiratory systems (8% each), diseases of the digestive system (7%), congenital malformations (7%), mental and behavioural disorders (4%), and diseases of the circulatory system (4%).
Add to this, the release of a recent study, that found adults with FASD have greater illness rates than the general population, and it is more reason to worry about her future. CBC British Columbia reported on the survey results from 541 people living with the disorder in Canada and the United States. It was co-authored by Myles Himmelreich, CJ Lutke and Emily Travis.
Of over 260 questions pertaining to conditions in 25 areas, such as hearing, autoimmune or cardiovascular disease, they found that people with the disorder experienced health problems at a rate that was anywhere from two times to more than 100 times higher than the general population.
Among the general population, about five to eight per cent of people suffer from a total of 80 autoimmune diseases. Yet the survey found that 29.5 per cent of people living with fetal alcohol spectrum disorder who were surveyed reported having at least one of only 10 of those diseases, including rheumatoid arthritis, celiac disease and lupus.
The rate of chronic ear infections among adults who were surveyed was 147 times higher than the general population, and 8.1 per cent of those who took part in the survey reported having hearing loss or problems that began after the age of 20.
Early onset dementia, which happens in people under the age of 65, also affected people in the study at a rate that is 104 times higher than the general population.
Then there is the study completed by Anne Streissguth which looked at outcomes for people between 6 – 51 who have FAS:
Given all the above, how can I possibly remain hopeful for a bright future as an adult?
There is a glimmer. Science has shown an adolescent brain continues to develop until the age of 25. There is still time to be persistent, consistent, maintain structure, support and accommodation, so the maiden has a chance at a meaningful life beyond the age of 34 years.
Of the above chart we are 3 of 6. Trying to avoid the other 3, while navigating the new adult world is exhausting however. When she turned 18 all support services ended. She was transferred to the adult world. But while many 18 year olds are planning their futures and getting on with their lives – we are stuck in a holding pattern. The wait list for adult services in Ontario is between three and ten years – depending on what service is required.
As the above graphic illustrates, although the maiden is 18 years old in age, her skill level varies. These developmental ages are approximate and generalized based on studies. Although her development has been varied all through her life, adding age of majority into the mix has created some new challenges I am just starting to discover. There is a wide variation between developmental age and chronological age. This difference makes it even more difficult to support her, because in some areas she has the skills of a much younger person, yet in others is typical or even “older”. She is an adult in the eyes of the world around us, and as such is allowed certain privileges, yet she still needs assistance.
Obviously I know her like no other person, yet I don’t know how to best support her as an adult. According to an article I found on the National Organization for Fetal Alcohol Syndrome website (NOFAS), they breakdown the difference between a “neurotypical” 18 year old and an 18 year old with FASD in this way:
Another resource from Community Living British Columbia (Canada) called Supporting Success for Adults with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder contains tips and strategies for caregivers and people who work with those affected by FASD.
The booklet stresses:
Adults with FASD have often experienced chronic failures and wounding. Building on successes is vital to promoting and maintaining positive self-esteem.
Interventions should focus on changing the environment to enhance the potential for success, decrease frustration and maximize creative support options
And while this is nothing new, as this is what needs to be done for younger children, being an adult brings about a new world of challenges the maiden (and I) are going to have to learn how to navigate.
Some strategies for creating environments that support success:
- Build on Gifts: What is the person good at? What is a strength or ability the person has?
- Stay Curious: Respectful support begins with honouring the uniqueness of each individual.
- Language Matters: Remember these individuals use and process language differently.
- Safeguards are Important: to reduce risk and vulnerability. These safeguards include both formal and informal friendships, personal support networks, neighbours, social connections, community connections, clubs, volunteer and work.
“In supporting people with FASD, the emphasis should be on establishing functional and supportive structures rather than imposing control.” What would this look like?
Developing a schedule and assistance with:
- Self care routines
- Money and budgeting
- Shopping and Meal Preparation
- Household upkeep and maintenance
- Work (paid or unpaid)
How do I create a life filled with hope for the maiden? My journey learning to support her as an adult has just begun. I am seeking out resources written by professionals, caregivers and adults with FASD. Even though each individual with FASD is unique, I should be able to learn from the collective experience of this group who have or are travelling the adult road.
The Road to Adulthood is a Bumpy Ride
What makes this journey so bumpy right now is I have no one to help us.
She qualifies for assistance through Developmental Services Ontario. But she is on the wait list.
Having a Mild Intellectual Disability, she qualifies to remain in school until she is 21 in the Learning and Life Skills program. I thought that would buy us some time while we waited for a support worker, employment support and access to day programs. However, last week she announced she does not want to go back to school.
Legally, she can leave school. She has obtained an Ontario Secondary School Certificate so she does not need to be there. She does want to go to a two year supported college program for adults with intellectual disabilities – we are still waiting to hear if she is accepted. But what am I supposed to do with her for the next six months?
I was fortunate enough to be able to stay at home to support her as a child – but that is no longer the case. I am looking for a job to support myself right now. She can’t be left alone all day. We live in a small rural village and there are no programs she can go to.
It’s difficult to remain hopeful when we are stuck on this road filled with obstacles to success.
A Glimmer of Hope in the Distance
But just when I’m feeling depressed and out of hope, along comes something (or should I say someone) which gives me a boost. I will leave you with a link to a very personal and powerful video I’m not broken. I don’t need fixing., by Myles Himmelreich, a 39 year old man who has FAS. He speaks eloquently and honestly about the isolation and stigma he and his mother faced, and he still faces, because of the ignorance and stereotypes that still surround Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders. Yet he shows us that he is not defined by his diagnosis. He challenges us to see him.
It is difficult to not talk about the challenges faced by people with FASD. I struggle how to share what our day to day life is like, while trying to maintain privacy that is respectful to the maiden. Yet if I don’t share what our life is really like people will not understand how difficult the road is.
I am hopeful, with education and acceptance, the world will become a more welcoming and inclusive place for all.