Dennis the Menace or Dennis the Misunderstood
Comic strip can be found here: http://dennisthemenace.com/comics/february-5-2009/
Did Dennis say these things because he was young or because he lacked the filter or social skills that most neuro-typical people have. He said it because he lacked the filter which stops most of us from saying something that might hurt another’s feelings or it is something we might later regret having said.
Even at sixteen years old the maiden repeats things innocently enough, but innocent or not, they are not appropriate for the situation. For me it means awkward silences and embarrassed pauses. For her, she loses potential friends because they do not understand she doesn’t say things on purpose or to be mean. She says them because she is thinking them and does not have the impulse control or filter the neuro-typical person has.
Just this week I noticed she was on the list as not needing bus transportation for school. I told her not to say anything to the bus driver until I spoke to the school to correct it. You can see where I am going with this? The very next morning she asked the driver if she was on his list. Luckily she was.
Not a big deal this time. And there really isn’t a lot I say or do that would be embarrassing … But there are words or actions that are not intended for public display. In the life of FASD however everything is fair game.
Ha, I have two of these. Pretty sure sometimes they do it on purpose. 🙂
Yes, sometimes they do. In this case her anxiety about maybe not being on the list I think over-rided anything else! 😉
Oh, I meant MINE do it on purpose sometimes. 🙂 But yes, the anxiety does override all. My son forgot his library book the other day. He was very upset and couldn’t see past not getting a new book (they can’t get new books out unless they turn in the one they had)…I was waiting all day for the call that he’d had a fight with the librarian or something…I call it “mental pitbull syndrome.” 🙂 Thankfully, he was able to let it go…I was pleasantly but thoroughly shocked.
Ha, ha… Poor kid eh! My daughter gets that way sometimes – in grade 2 she was focused on getting a cheese string she saw in the playground – she left the classroom and had the school in lock down! I’m having a real tough go right now with her – she is refusing to go to school!
Have you tried bringing in outside authority figures? I don’t know if it would work in her case, but in our son’s case, we explained the problem to some of the deputies at the sheriff’s department and they were more than happy to help. Maybe asking if a truant officer would be willing to talk with her would help (or not…but it’s worth a shot…). Also, it might keep you out of hot water if they know you’re trying to get her to school. Again, my situation is a little different from yours, so this may completely not help, but thought I’d mention.
The school is aware … We don’t have truancy officers up here … But her teachers will phone her and ask her if she is coming in …. She has been put in all sorts of specialized programs to lessen her stress and anxiety …. But to no help. I am beginning to think that school is just not a place she can function well in – except the odd thing is I am told she is fine at school – but she tells me she isn’t … I wish I could see her there without her knowing – so I could see for myself …
Sorry for the delay; it’s been one of THOSE weeks. Do you think the school would allow you to record her in the classroom as long as no other kids are in the shot? I’ve considered asking about this for my guy. Probably best if she didn’t realize (and therefore act differently), so maybe using a small Flip-type camera, or a laptop sitting on teacher’s desk. There are likely laws against it, but it seems like a possible fix…
I cull much of my self help from comics – still ‘funny’ waters run ‘insightfully’ deep. 🙂 I have a 16-year-old daughter too and they do like to role play adult…
She’s a great teen, but I do remind her she is 16 from time to time.
AnnMarie 🙂
Have a great thursday
lol – yes, my daughter goes from 6 – 26 some days! Thanks for commenting AnnMarie!